Dear Parish Family,
Continuing His Sermon on the Mount, Jesus tells us to love our enemies and not seek revenge on those who have hurt us. If this were easy, Jesus wouldn't need to tell us to do these things! All of us struggle with forgiving and loving those who have caused deep or lasting harm in our lives. In fact, many who have been deeply wounded or abused can testify that it is impossible to follow these commands of Christ to forgive and love an enemy without first letting Christ into the heart to heal those places of pain. Often, those who cause the deepest pain in our lives are those who are closest to us. Christ doesn't want any of us to stay 'stuck' in a destructive, harmful, sinful, or abusive relationship. Jesus asks us to remain in relationship with Him as we move through the journey of healing and forgiveness on the path to spiritual freedom.
 
I'd like to offer a few concrete steps for granting and seeking forgiveness, along with a forgiveness meditation in the link below, that will be immensely helpful to those of us who struggle with forgiveness and love of our enemies. Obviously this journey and steps take time. You may not be able to go through all the steps right now, but begin where you are able and the Lord will be there to guide you every step of the way. These steps and this video might be valuable for you to save as a reference and keep in your place of prayer.
 
Granting Forgiveness (be firm, honest, and objective in naming your pain and your needs):

1. Acknowledge pain and anger in a safe place, perhaps first to a counselor or spiritually mature friend if not to the person him or herself ("I'm hurt by those words or actions").
2. Be specific about boundaries ("I insist on being treated better going forward").
3. Give up the desire for revenge, and let go of blame, resentment and negativity ("I am not going to try to 'get even' with this person. I don't want a hardened heart. I want my heart to be free").
4. Communicate an act of forgiveness ("I forgive you for how your behaviors harmed me").
5. Work toward reconciliation if possible ("I hope that you can reflect on what I've shared with you and examine what you want to do going forward").

 Seeking Forgiveness (be able to name your hurtful actions concretely without justifying sinful behaviors):

1. Take responsibility for your actions and admit what you did was wrong, sinful, or hurtful ("I was wrong for treating you in this way").
2. Empathize with the person's pain ("Thank you for sharing how my behavior affected you. I can see how that would be hurtful to you").
3. Apologize and ask for forgiveness ("I am sorry for what I did. Please forgive me").
4. Work to re-establish trust by committing not to hurt the person again ("I understand it might take you time to forgive me and regain my trust. Please know that I am committed to respecting your boundaries and not hurting you in this way again").
5. Forgive yourself ("Lord, thank you for helping me acknowledge and ask forgiveness for the wounds my sins have caused others. Thank you above all for Your mercy. Help me receive your mercy so I can forgive myself as You have forgiven me").

 Listen to Sister Miriam James Heidland's "Forgiveness Meditation":
https://youtu.be/WTDWS6V3_Ow 
 
Catholic Charities Annual Appeal
I look forward to celebrating our CCAA commitment weekend with you today! Catholic Charities serves over 400,000 people in need annually right here in our Diocese of Cleveland. These individuals and families rely on the life-saving works Catholic Charities provides each year. Your donation also helps our parish budget by supporting services that would be cost-prohibitive for us to try to perform on our own without the overhead and networking capacity that Catholic Charities offers. Please pledge generously.
DONATE HERE
 
Lent: Ash Wednesday, Fish Fry, Parish Mission
This Wednesday begins our solemn celebration of the Season of Lent.

• See the bulletin for Ash Wednesday Mass times.
• Come to the St. Mary Fish Fry and volunteer some time if you are able. All Fish Fry proceeds supports our St. Mary School Adopt-a-Student fund to help families with tuition assistance. A great meal for a great cause!
• Come to the three nights of our Parish Mission on Sunday February 26, Monday February 27, and Tuesday February 28. Each night begins in church at 6:30 pm and lasts for an hour. I am leading each night of our parish mission. The theme is RIM (Relationship, Identity, Mission). Each night of the mission will go deeper into the themes of remaining in relationship with Jesus, securing our baptismal identity in Him, and living out the unique mission God has entrusted to us.

Check out the Lent page on our parish website to volunteer for the Fish Fry, and to see the many spiritual and liturgical opportunities in the week ahead.
 
I am yours in Christ,
Fr. Scott Goodfellow